Everything that isn’t food comes to our house directly. UPS, FedEx, Amazon…they back their trucks up and someone hops out, drops a package – or packages – onto the porch and they’re off again. All but UPS gone before the dog can even get a bark out. With UPS, he hears the engine of the truck and loses his mind instantly. UPS wronged my dog in another time. He won’t let it go.

This time, it was a truck with a delivery from IKEA. We needed a medicine cabinet and, well, we liked the one we had in the last house. Apparently, it’s uncouth to take the medicine cabinet when you move, so we ordered a new one.

And the drivers left…the pallet?

This isn’t the worst thing to happen to me. In fact, the beams of the pallet are about the size of lumber that I need for a garage project, so I’m gonna go ahead and disassemble it for reuse. And given the fact that my brother has had difficulty getting lumber (everyone is building a deck this summer for some reason) having this simply show up on my doorstep is a gift not to be squandered.

We’re in a strange place where time isn’t moving the way it should. Or at least not in the way that we expect. We’ve lived in this house since March and haven’t spoken to more than a handful of neighbors because, well, we’re all keeping to our yards and the bits of family in our immediate bubble. No one around here seems to be taking risks. This clearly isn’t Florida. It’s far quieter and people are enjoying what they can of the outdoors before winter arrives again and the walls close in.

I’m trying to remember what I’ve forgotten about these summers. This is one we will not soon forget.

Scanning my notebook this morning over coffee and I’ve noticed that I’m logging long lists of projects. Most of them involve time away from screens and no internet connection. Some involve a computer tangentially, but aside from that, they are low-to-no-tech things to do. I have to wonder if part of this extended period away from things is creating an urge simply to stay busy.

It’s the middle of July, but we’re already writing off the fall. We’re wrapping our heads around what will be over the next few months and there is a part of me that is making sure I have a backlog of things to lose myself in as the walls get tight come winter. Work will not slow down. For me, it will likely only accelerate for reasons. My family is going to be trapped in an infinite loop of home school / remote learning. Activities will be limited. These are all horrible to contemplate all day long, but there they are.

So what does one do? Build things. Assemble things. Paint things. Solder things. Carve things. And watch birds. Or paddle on a lake. Or go fishing. Or scribble madness into a notebook that will be lost in a drawer someday. Anything but sit idle.

List after List. Todo after Todo. Finding ways to exercise agency.